My Experiences Within Motherhood, & my Attempts to Maintain a Personal Life Outside of It.

My experiences within motherhood and my attempt to maintain a personal life outside of it.
...Here I record my own self discipline: My commitment not to "let myself go". My promise to seek my God and follow my passions.
My attempt to do so despite and amidst the chaos of chasing around my high-energy kids while learning the French culture...

Saturday, August 17, 2013

The Fight to NOT Stay in Pajamas All Day.

Last night (okay, technically this morning), between the wee hours of four and six-thirty a.m., I was up over eight (8!) different times. Filling cups with water, calming fears from scary dreams (about giant chickens!), changing diapers and just plain soothing tears. Need I mention that I also went to bed after 2 am? Yup. Loads o' fun.

I am a just a little bit tired.  Heck yes.  Just a {lot} bit tired!

Disclaimer: Shame on me if I fail to mention that my oh-so-amazing husband let me sleep in this morning till noon while he watched the kids (yes, I am that lucky)... but somehow that hairy beast called fatigue is still very present upon my rising today.

Needless to say, it qualifies for one of those days that would be so easy to stay in PJs, not shower, and not-bother-cooking-but-just-snack-all-day-long. In fact, I might even say that last night's sleeplessness would completely warrant such a day, and no one would argue with me. To make it even easier, I have nothing pressing to accomplish today, no need to really even leave the house... so why not?

But isn't that just how we moms slip into that rut? That slump? That "I don't care about my own self worth but only my child's well-being" sort of attitude?  It's easy to play the martyr as a mother of very young children.  You are tired often, house-bound regularly, and your most effective accomplishments throughout the day may only be finally pulling that load out of the dryer and getting the kids to brush their teeth on their own before bed.

Now, I will be the first to admit that I still fall victim to those days of sweat pants and unbrushed hair and I even believe that it is important to take that break from time to time.... Nothing wrong with it. (Dare I admit that my son is still in his pajamas and it is after 1:30?) Sometimes, those are my favorite kind of days.

But I also know another thing to be true:

Even if I never leave the four walls of this house, even if we eat cereal for dinner, even if I'm tired all day long and never see anyone outside of my immediate family today, I am worth more than sloppy PJs and an unkept look. And you know what? My family is too. They deserve the best part of me.  My husband deserves to see a wife who takes pride in the beauty God gave her and the beauty that he admires. I had a hair dresser who once told me that her mother would always put lipstick on right before her husband came home from work. She wanted to offer him her best self, even after a long day of keeping house and children.

My kids deserve the best part of me too.  My kids deserve a mommy who is fully present and ready for the day, right down to my appearance. They need to see modeled a discipline of putting one's best self forward even on the mediocre days.  That modeling starts with putting on clothes, powdering the face, and brushing the hair.  Have a little self respect.  It speaks loudly to your children.  And it goes a long way.  Shoot, I know that when I take the time to look special, I accomplish more and I feel good about myself.  And that remains true even if the only person who sees what I look like that day is the reflection in the mirror.  It gives me a healthy sense of pride and self worth.   And don't you think that alone is worth it?

God created each of us with value and beauty.  Far be it from me to fail to attempt to see and display that to myself and my family.

I could pass this day off as a day stolen by the thief of exhaustion and an "I deserve a break" philosophy.  (Again, don't get me wrong... sometimes I do!)  But I'm beginning to believe that the alternative is more important. So instead, I choose put on a cute outfit, and greet the day with a thankful smile -- albeit a tired smile, but a smile nonetheless.

Start today beautiful.

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added note: when I came out dressed and make up on today, my husband proclaimed, "Wow!  Throw yourself together like that every day, and we will always have a great marriage!  You look amazing!"
that alone made the extra effort worth it!!

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